It’s not easy to face life as it is with your own self. It’s rather impossible to do it, lacking everything. A long-lasting happiness which probably one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard in life, have noted that loyalty could be the key. Whereas, happiness which also one of the most preposterous stuffs that could happen to any couple, stated that ‘do everything what you want to do’ is what you need to do in your life. These are the things that make your life complete. Then, I laughed.
My friend, my friend. A collection of beautiful qualities in your life is not the only thing that will make your life remain at peace. I was told by my father every time I was about to fly to Kuala Lumpur that, once you’ve started plucking, you should never pick up the remaining. Well yes, I admit that is the only thing he always had to say to all his sons and we’re kind of tired listening to it [Sorry pa! Hahaha]. But, when I give it a second thought; it bases not only on the study of all of us siblings, but our life as well. He’s such a smart talker, I would say. You could do everything without looking back every things you left behind, and it’s just a matter of being able to work it out and putting back the little piece to where it belongs; fixing back the repulsiveness.
After tutorial and had some [I mean HUGE] plates of meal at Ali Maju, me and Yogi went back to his home just for a while at Medang Serai, Bangsar. Luckily it wasn’t jammed. After lingering around his room for a while, I decided to leave but was stuck at Alicia’s room. I knew that she was about to leave for Australia, but every time we meet, there’s just so much things we could talk about that I could sometime lost track of time as well as the “moving to Australia” part. Eventually, she spitted it out and we spent several hours talking about life, love and the future. She’s such an intelligent and sweet girl. I still wonder why anyone could never see that in her. I told her that I’ve a plan to move out as well. This could be my last semester in HELP, or maybe Malaysia. But who knows; maybe I’ll be coming back.
I was monitoring the conversation. And I realized that there is a similarity between me and her. I couldn’t help but noticing that her enthusiast towards writing is something that she could not put away. She talks about all sorts of things in her writings, same as me. And then, I cracked up something else during the conversation; it’s the way we see life. When you do something that you really love, I mean REALLY REALLY LOVE, you’ll see things in life differently.
It’s like you are sitting with a notepad and a pen on top of a hill. Down there you’ll see how the grandparents are watching their grandchildren playing; mothers are cooking and might be weeping tears to the onions. Fathers tell jokes, or doing fences, and the kids say “Pa, I need some money to buy books” while in the back of their mind, their loved one is waiting to be bought an ice-cream. How sweet you would say? Yes, but dear friends, all good things come to an end. One day, you will see the most revolting and upsetting views you could ever imagine. Yes, all things seem similar, but through an enthusiast’s eyes, you see the disguise and obscurity that has and about to happen. My dear friends, all good things come to an end. But be worry not, that’s when the praying part takes turn. God will always be there, smiling to your pray.
Let's talk about relationship, let's talk about disappointment, let's talk about...LOVE Love is not like a wind that cools us off and leave, neither like a rain that helps us cover our tears temporarily. It comes like a nighttime, it comes and it cools you down. Listens to you all night long, without hesitating. Caressing you when you close your eyes.
Love is something you can't define blindly, though it sometimes is said to be blind. You would never know how bad it is to be in love, and knowing that at the end of the day, you won't be getting the same thing as you've given out. But it is worse when you give out your heart, and getting the same back; but didn't last like you've wished it to be. Frustrating of course, so frustrating.
The distance.
Yes, the distance. Still vague here. But I've felt the same way before, I've left my loved one miles and miles away to go to where I am now. And yes, we've broken up after a year and a half. That was unfortunate, and people blame the distance; I go up on the fence. I control myself just to let me think of everything that has happened. Is it because of me? Or maybe my loved one. Took me time to just ponder all about it. I never blamed my other half, but still blaming myself for not being able to look after my emotions. I could say, I was kind of like a prisoner and I am kind of tied up. I lost to the rock'n'roll of my relationship, but I was happy. Eventually, I surrendered to my feelings. There's no escape from your feelings, and it never will help you to escape from anything.Said the person who hopes: My friend, I am not a preacher. I have no reason to order you around, let alone to fall for me. You have no reason to fall for me, because anything that you see is everything that you might get. What you have wished for me to be, may be impossible for me to be. These things might sound a little bit over-exaggerated, but yes, that's what I am. But that is fine, don't worry. I won't ruin our sweet rapture. Seeing you sad, hurts me inside. I might never be able to say I Love You because I care for you. Just let me play on my role as a stranger. Making you avoiding me is the last thing I want to do now, and that the first thing would be seeing you. Sometimes you push me than I dare, but as cool as it gets, I'll bomb my guts. But despite all of things; I can only be with you as a friend/as a brother/as a listener. I dare not say this, but please don't ever and ever doubt my strong feelings for you. :') Said the person who's disappointed: My friend, I can't hope no more. Seeing you with him/her hurts me inside. Me being a slave to your heart, is hard than what I've expected. I stood up for you, I might have to follow the wrong way but you're still the one that led me. I had a nice time walking with you, and surely one of the few most wonderful times I had in my life. I carved you in my heart, and I gave you everything but to know that I was just something to be wasted. Just go on with what you like, let the one who loves you sit and do nothing but watching the memories fading. I used to feeling hazed with the word LOVE, but his story is history. It's cool, no sweat. I accept now the fact that, I am disappointed.
Said the idiot: My friend, I just... Nothing. I am fine, don't mind me. I am good.
Voila! And my meals are inside my esophagus. I was watching Moulin Rouge when they all crawled down from my jaws to inside of me. It was an excellent piece, I must say. Beautiful in a moment, though is sentimental. Again, it gets me.
You see, I don’t have enough time to brag about mom these few days because everyone is doing the same thing. I don’t want to talk about her because it’s Mother’s Day. I want to talk about her because she is a mother.
Along the way to my 21 almost 22 years existing, I’ve accepted more than enough from a woman I call a mother. Then again, it impresses me how I never get enough of it dearly. Maybe that is why you call it “The Mother’s Touch”. We all embrace aging, but nearly all of us deny that we miss the moment we had with her. Some of us work hard to earn that back, but maybe of our ego it goes back to how it was, walking away.
Getting older doesn’t mean we get to leave our memories together. Getting older doesn’t mean we get to grow up of how we are not raised to be. Getting older also doesn’t mean that we get to leave her alone; because it’s not fair, it never was and it never will be.
How do you feel seeing your mother walking down the aisle of people around the town knowing that she barely has RM10 inside her wallet? How do you feel seeing your mother walks around with her best friend to a farmers market when the only thing she can afford to buy is three pieces of chicken wings for her three children? How do you feel seeing your mother, bringing one plastic bag with only the chicken wings inside while helping her friend lifting up hers on her right hand?
Do you want to see your mom work to her last breath just to pay your expenses? Do you want to make wrong moves when she says it’s not the way you supposed to go? Do you want to see people look down on your mom just because you didn’t try your best in your life? Do you want to see how sad she will be when she knows that you live in filth?
Her love is deep. So deep that she could throw anything away just to give us everything. We walk on earth because of her, we run because of the breath she gave us. The time we had together, is the time we should precious the most. Nothing could ever win the love of a mother, because she knew everything that happens within us. She knows how bad we feel when we are being rebellious, but she knows if she speaks back, it will only scratch the pure bond between a mother and her child. And so she just sits back... and silent, like always.
We don't know how hard she pray every single night. Praying to Him, asking for happiness to be poured onto you. How she sometimes cry in her sleep remembering how high you raised your voice to her. How she weeps her own tears, without anyone's help. Praying to Him, saying let all the burdens of my children are put upon me, struggle till my last breath. It is an obvious communication, and she tells it by the wrinkles on her face that you see so ugly. Or her sweats you smell like a debris.
You don't know how touched she was when you shake her hands, kiss her on her cheeks. That is when she actually could ask for nothing else but that. When she sees you holding her hands, sits beside her and lean your head on her shoulder. That is the moment when she feels like she has been a successful mother, not educationally nor monetarily. But in the sense of loving. That is all she longs for.
She gave up everything she wanted just to raise us up perfectly, and she gave up everything just to make you happy. Her effort is not to be paid back; she only wants to be remembered. She wanted us to be raised up without a glitch, and when we own that, appreciation is the only thing she looks for. Not monetarily, not materialistically, but by remembering. Commemoration of an effort of a woman called a mother. Happy Mother’s Day.
"Saya sayang ibu, saya rindu ibu. Kalau saja tanganmu masih bisa kucium, kalau saja tubuhmu bisa kupeluk, kalau saja rambutmu bisa ku usap. Oh ibu, cinta aku kasih aku,tetap untukmu hingga ke mati. Oh Tuhan, sesungguhnya engkau telah kurniakan aku mukjizat yang sangat bermakna. Mukjizat yang sangat putih dihatinya, mukjizat yang sangat suci dijiwanya. Seandainya dia pergi sebelumku, engkau tempatkanlah ia dikalangan mereka yang engkau cintai. Aku menadah tangan, mengirim doa kudusku, semoga rohnya Kau cucuri segala rahmat. Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin"
Sesungguhnya tiada kasih tertanding, selain kasih ibuku.
Selamat Hari Ibu buat ibu-ibu sedunia, dan kepada mereka yang telah pergi, Al-Fatihah.
I am extremely down when it comes to this issue. That cute little fingers, and those fragile bones inside of them, those little ones who in the future may have the possibilities of making you proud, thrown away, JUST LIKE THAT. Awfully hurtful!
See how cute this baby is :'( this angel's face reminds me of my little cousin, Canon. :'(
Newscasts concerning babies being thrown away, killed, and tormented are spreading. Do we really want this to go on? Some may say NO, those who say "YES"[and why on earth is that, by the way?] I yearn for your explanations. Let's put ourselves inside their shoes, what can you see? You've just started seeing the sunlight, you've just started to see the people whom you think may give you a chance to walk on earth. All of a sudden, you were dragged out of the comfort and put inside a box, or perhaps a dark colored plastic even. Left there; lonely with stinging mosquitoes, alone with no one else to hold you. Left there; with nothing to eat, to be bitten by those wild beasts. Left there; still confused, asking themselves what mistake did they have done to you.
This issue offered me an idea for an assignment of my Public Speaking class the other day. My persuasive speech entitled "Child Poverty: Have we cared enough?" has helped me to earn 95 marks out of 100 for this last assignment. It was just okay, but believe me while presenting this, I was extremely into it. The script that I've written the whole night was kept inside my jeans' pocket; because I know how difficult and hurtful those little ones felt when not only their skin, flesh but the most important is (their heart), torn apart by poor humans' crave. ::i.ndra:: Could we put into visual, if only they could utter words that very moment. They probably will thank us for willing to bring them anywhere for the whole 9 months, they probably will show their gratitude for giving them a chance to see the world, they probably will promise that they will take care of you when they've grown up. And, they probably will someday, make you proud for having them in your life.
But who knows, maybe they will still thank you, for giving them a chance to see the little world of ours. The world which you see as heaven, and in our perspective, world full of immorality, sins, dirt. Maybe up there, they are looking at you... Smiling, but still ........................heartbroken. How white, how pure their heart is.
Please people, I beg you to not throw them to the nature. Give them to the people who are willing to treat them as a baby, as a human. Everyone makes mistakes, no matter how big the mistakes are, it still have nothing to do with that newborn angel. The great Gandhi once said;
"There is no place on earth and no race, which is not capable of producing the finest types of humanity, given suitable opportunities and education" - quoted, Mahatma Gandhi.
we still can change, how? by giving yourself an opportunity to change [save a baby] - Indra Mozainie
