Minal Aidil Wal Faidzin.
Hmm… Sabah *grins*.
Remembering what has happened in the past, cries my little gut.
Listening to the beautiful takbir surely bangs my whole body to the wall. Suddenly it hits me that this is going to be the first time I am celebrating the Eid miles and miles away from the land I call home, one real home. I knew that someday something like this would in some way, happen to me. But I didn’t expect that it is going to be this fast.
"I hope this will worth it."
I played songs to ease up my missing to the people I love back at home. Instead, it strikes me a little bit harder. Maybe it is right when they say; it is not easy to forget your past. Sharing-the-moments type of memory, how hurtful. It fondles me when in my mind; I bring back every bit of seconds I carved with my family, my lovely friends. I remember how the little kids will be running all over the kampung, to light up firecrackers and make a lot of noises. The elders will be a bit furious, but it wouldn’t last that long. Because they've been in their shoes, they've been kids themselves.
How beautiful it is to have been born in a village.
To those who have parted.
The Eid will not be a perfect celebration without family members going to the graveyard visiting people who have stopped by in their life for a small amount of time. This is to remember those who have parted, those who have done so much for the earlier generations. Some of them cried while pouring the water on the grave, they may have flashed back the times the deceased was still around. Maybe there are times they made mistakes, but they know deep in heart that it is in their soul that holds a white divine saintly kindness. Remembrance
I remember before I came back to Kuala Lumpur the other day, I was sitting on the porch of my late grandma’s shop. I saw an old lady, from afar walking up the road gradually, slowly. With all the plastic bags she was holding, how hard it is to be an old people. It was during fasting month. Then things popping up across my mind, where have all her children gone? Where have all the family members gone? Do they still live with this old lady? She passed me by, she looked at me and I threw a smile. She replied me a really sour beam of smile.
“That is sour", I said in heart, smiling, but heartbroken.
"She must’ve been hurt so many times"
It is a tradition to remember those who have gone, in this very moment. And let me add, it is another time to learn by heart the kindness people around you have been giving you, without us realizing. It’s a real moment of silent, in heart.
It is time to say sorry. It is time to thank our mothers, and it is time to thank our fathers. It is time to thank the rest of the family members. When I read the newspapers, I could see how much a family meant a lot for anyone. Seeing the elderly people being left by their sons, daughters, grandchildren hurt me so much that in my heart, I could only say God bless these people. Remember my friend; they won’t be here for a long time. Yes they may have hurt us, and yes they have given us bad experiences to put up with. But friends, they are not here for long.
If they are sick, just take care of them. That’s it, just take care. In their heart, the only thing that they wish for at that moment is for you to be with them and to see your face, craving to hold your hand. They will not be here for long.
Let it be like that, just hang on for a while. In no time, they will be blowing their last breath. Then, at that time you will be free. That time, you don’t have to do anything but remembering their hard love towards you. That time you don’t have to think about what they have done to you. Sometimes it is better to just let things go, it is better to let things rot itself inside heart. Heal it by purifying our heart and saint our mind and soul. God has helped us by giving us opportunities to repent for forgiveness. No matter how bad you are in your past, it is time we move out from it. Put back the little piece of things that have been lost to where it belongs.
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir dan Batin.
P/S:
Di kesempatan ini, saya ingin mengucapkan Salam Aidilfitri kepada semua. Maafkan jika saya ada tersalah tulis, tersalah buat, tersalah tutur. Kalau ada yang tidak senang dengan keberadaan saya, saya minta maaf juga. Kalau ada kesempatan [insyAllah], jemputlah datang rumah di Kampung Lohan. Ranau. Walaupun saya tiada, cakap saja “Saya kawan si Indra, jadi saya mau serang rumah kamu.. Muahahahahahaha!!”. Dorang pasti terima alas an tu.
